Every time I have a "bad mommy" moment, I should just watch Supernanny to make myself feel better. Holy cow... some of these parents should have never had children. Some of those people are just in over their heads, but others seem to let their kids parent themselves. I don't know if they are just lazy or if they don't care. They call the Supernanny when they have lost control. Thank goodness we have a grip on things enough to avoid Supernanny.
However, I had a pretty bad mommy moment at Target yesterday. I felt HORRIBLE about what happened. Ironically, we were shopping for a reward chart for Jackson. I was looking at poster board and pens and Jackson was wandering around near me. Amelia was in the cart and not happy about it. When I was ready to go, I looked around me. I was annoyed because he wasn't right behind me looking at the stickers. In the corner of my eye I saw a little boy with a yellow shirt over by the shampoo with an adult. As I am looking/calling for Jackson I started panicking and wondering if Jackson was with the wrong adult. I headed toward the area I thought I saw his yellow shirt. I then saw the uniformed security guard walking with him toward me. I scolded him for walking away from me. He started to cry and I realized that he was pretty scared. Man, I suck. I knelt down and hugged him for a while. I felt bad for scolding him. I told him later that the reason I was so mad at him for not following the rules was because I was scared that I had lost him. I told him that he is my most precious thing in the world and that I NEVER want to lose him.
I know it will not be the last time that I deserve the "bad mommy moment" award (it definitely was not the first). I just have to keep loving them and letting them know how much I love them. I have tried to use yesterday's scare as a learning experience. Right now, I am just counting my blessings that nothing bad happened to him...
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